Friday Repost: Should This Really Impress Me?

After a recent date, I mentioned that a guy had really impressed me, and the parents asked why.

“Well, he planned the date. Really thoroughly. And he led. I was able to just sit back and relax and let him take care of everything.”

The parents exchanged glances. Back in their day, this would have been expected. But since an inordinate quantity of my dates ask me where we’re going, take me to museums that are closed, or even forget what time the date was called for (yes, I’ve been texted by a guy asking when he was supposed to show up), this seemingly nominal showing of competence was a Big Deal.

I frequently promise myself that the next guy who asks me where we’re going when I’m already in his car is going to be taking me to Orchidea or some other super-expensive Boro Park restaurant. But so far I haven’t be able to muster the nastiness to actually do it.

But here’s a fond recollection of some of those earlier disappointments.

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9 thoughts on “Friday Repost: Should This Really Impress Me?

  1. Not that I never had a problem coming up with an idea of where to go, but I always thought it’s obvious that you know where you’re taking a girl beforehand.

  2. I thought it’s being polite! Some girls would rather go for coffee than a lounge (it makes em feel uncomfortable), so what’s wrong with giving them a chance to speak their preference?

  3. what’s wrong with having 2 or 3 plans, depending on what the weather is, meteorologically speaking or otherwise? the trick is not letting the lady know that there was more than 1 plan!

  4. Rebbetzin H:

    Why not let her know?

    I vote for “I was thinking we could go to x or y, or maybe do z, if you don’t mind being outdoors. Which would you prefer?”

    I can’t imagine why anyone would object to someone who had planned not one, but two or three options.

  5. A guy who can’t even give a date enough forethought to plan something, anything, reveals quite a bit about his character.

  6. Princess Lea, I’m not that old :)

    FrumGeek, nothing wrong if you actually have options to offer. Bad4′s talking about spending half of the date coming up with options, where the girl is responsible for thinking and making a decision, instead of evaluating whether a guy is actually what she’s looking for.

  7. Dude, want to share some ideas with us? I’m constantly struggling to find creative and fun things to do. It’s exacerbated by work and school which limits our dates to evenings.

    I always offer multiple options at the beginning of the dating process. I have no idea if the girl likes playing pool, enjoys lounges or will want to eat dinner. One girl was obsessed with lounges, another was too nervous to eat for the first 5 dates and one couldn’t play pool.

    Once I get to know her, I can then either come up with my own ideas or share the process of deciding what to do with her.

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