Pettiness Award: Too Dark, Too Light, Just Right

It was a fine winter afternoon in the Syrian shul when a would-be shadchan bustled up to an eligible bachelor who was enjoying a piece of potato kugel. “She’s here! The girl I’ve been raving about for you is here today!”

Eligible bachelor perked up his ears – what was left of them, after having them talked off about the virtues of this wonderful young lady. “Well, where is she?” he asked.

“Over there, over there,” the shadchan points to a pretty young woman chatting with her friends.

“That one on the left side?” frowned the bachelor.

“Yes, and she’s perfect for you,” enthused the shadchan.

“She’s too dark,” dismissed the bachelor, and went back to his potato kugel.

Now I’ve noticed that many of our Middle Eastern brethren are all gung-ho about assimilating into Ashkenazi culture – why else would they prefer potato kugel to that delicious rice their parents make? –  but too dark?

12 thoughts on “Pettiness Award: Too Dark, Too Light, Just Right

  1. can someone say pig?

    perhaps we should give him a little button with an oinker on it and a ribbon and tell him its his award for looking for such a “wonderful” wife.


  2. Nothing, not even a Sefardic woman, beats a nice dark potato kugel that has been in the Shabbos oven overnight. A true mechaya!

  3. It’s not always about assimilating into Ashkenazic culture. Did you really think that there wasn’t going to be some “nose turning” among the sefardim as well? Try redding a Moroccan girl to a Syrian boy. Or try redding a Persian boy to a Syrian girl. Or a Jordanian boy to a “of Spanish descent” girl. The “yichus” tree is alive and growing well by sefardim. And yes, unfortunately, “color” is a fruit of that tree. Just as not all Spaniards and not all Italians are black-haired and black-eyed, not all sefardim are of the same “coloration” either. And for some of them it matters. Not much different from trying to red a green-eyed redhead to certain chasidic sects, or even to some misnagdim.

  4. ha!

    I was once talking to some buddies and asked ” who’s that sphardi guy that hangs out with us some times?” and the horrified response was “hes not sphardi, his name is weiss / klein / shwartz etc. ”
    you get the idea, a PROUD hunk but it took a while till I discovered that.

    appearances are only skin deep.

  5. They don’t like dark. And they don’t like to mix countries of origin. Even cities. Aleppo is better than other places in Syria. There are Persians and then there are Persians. Higher classes of Persian don’t marry lower classes. Didn’t you guys know all of this? I’m Ashkenazi and I’ve known this since my dating days.

  6. Well, once I had a conversation that went like this:
    Me: “Who is that sephardi?”
    Some Fat Guy: “He’s an Ashkenazi!”
    Later I found out that the Sephardi/Ashkenazi had a Sephardi mother and an Ashkenazi father. So he really was an Ashkenazi/Sephardi!

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