The Bein Hazmanim Feeding Frenzy Has Begun

“The boys are back!”

The clarion calls sounds through Brooklyn, and is immediately followed by the clatter of heels on pavement as every mother of a bachelorette joins the stampede.

“The boys are back!” the murmur spreads across the city. Young ladies crane their necks out the window and then hurriedly pull them back in to dab on some makeup and check their hair.

“The boys are back!” the younger siblings whisper, pressing their ears against closed doors and comparing filched profiles behind the couch.

The boys are back!

Yes, it is bein hazmanim, and droves of eligible young men are pouring into the tri-state area and other Jewish metropolises. These are hungry salmon, looking to date vociferously before the season is up and they need to return to their swimming grounds in the Holy Land.

Once a week dating? Leave the leisure for the dog days. If the tempo of every other night is too much for you, get out of the race. There are hordes of women vying to give it a try in your stead. You have only three weeks to cram in the dating experiences of a month – hurry, hurry, hurry!

Who knows? He might be the One!

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24 thoughts on “The Bein Hazmanim Feeding Frenzy Has Begun

  1. *Gasp!* MM! Are you suggesting that you would want the best bochur in Lakeowod to put down his seforim, stop meeting his chavruta, and go out and *work* or something?! Oy! Vi chutzpadik! It might lead to… dancing!

  2. Not all of them intend to learn forever or even for very long or much at all – but they’re still learning until they get married.

    …but if you want a non-full-time-learner-before-marriage then you’re lucky – all year ’round is dating time. 😀

  3. You should write a song; this post was poetic, quick, and spot on usual. (oh, wait i’m not british. Okay, right on.)

    This is when I am grateful, as MM says, to be on the non-heilig “working boy” market. A shandeh.

  4. Not only do they steal our makom kavua;

    Not only do they steal our parking spaces;

    But they also steal our suggestions…

    G-d bless bein hazmanim…. (while the rest of us are still at work….)

  5. A full blown musical may be a little too much given the time restraints. A song however…

    Original music – http://youtube.com/watch?v=ham6vFy8v2I&feature=related

    Guess who just got back today?
    Them white-shirted boys that had been away
    Haven’t changed, still shteiging away
    But man, they gonna be datin’ like crazy

    They were asking which girls were around
    How pretty they are, and how much Dad’s puttin’ down
    Told them you were lookin’ for a learner
    That Lakewood’s your idea of heaven

    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    I said
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time

    You know that girl you used to see a lot
    Every day doing something else, well that’s all gonna stop
    Man I tell you she dropped it all like it was red hot
    I mean she started dating

    Manhattan @ 7:30 is the time and place
    One time this chick got up and she slapped “Johnny”’s face
    Man forgot which girl he was out with
    If that chick aint shomer negiah, forget her

    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    I said
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time

    Make sure you’re seen around
    Start dressing up, not down

    Get your name spread around

    Shabbos at Shul the girls will dress to kill
    At night, restaurants and lounges will fill
    The Diet Coke will flow ‘till he calls for the bill
    And if the boys don’t tip, you’d better dump them

    That Shadchanim in the corners do their dance & song
    The nights are getting warmer, it won’t be long
    Won’t be long till the weddings come
    Now that the boys are here again

    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    The boys are back in town
    It’s Bein Hazmanim time
    Spread the word around
    The boys are back in town
    The boys are back in town

    The bochurim are back, the bochurim are back

  6. Anon — go look in the archives. The musical has already begun. Scraps also contributed a song, and now G has written the 3rd. We really have something going here!

  7. hahaha. No wonder… I think four of my friends who have been pretty calm and out of scene lately, have just joined and are trying to take the world by storm.

  8. A few months ago, we were invited to a cousin’s wedding to take place in August, 2008. I told someone that there are frummies who haven’t even met each other yet, but will be married and have their baby before the August wedding 🙂

  9. i just realised!! these were written years ago!!! but its still sooo applicabbale!! im laughing away at how insane and charicatured it sounds yet is so so true!!!! laughing it off 🙂

  10. Pingback: Friday Repost: Bein Hazmanim Feeding Frenzy | Bad for Shidduchim

  11. Pingback: Repost: The Boys Are Back! | Bad for Shidduchim

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