Quote of the Week – Clueless

“I never dreamed that at this point in the game [with one son married and two more children ‘in the parsha’ for 2 and 3 years respectively] that I would still be so clueless about how the shidduch system works.”

10 thoughts on “Quote of the Week – Clueless

  1. This is something I hear very often from people who married off many of their children. Th bottom line is that it is something we will never understand. The girls in my class who I thought would go last were the first and vice versa. Eveyone says Money talks- yet there are plenty of wealthy girs I know who are “older and single”… SHIDDUCHIM (as well as everything else in life) IS NOT IN OUR HANDS.-This should be the only thing that we should understand.

  2. I could not agree more – shidduchim is one thing i’ll never understand. Just go to any vort and you can sit there in amazement wondering how this thing happened – how someone happened to mention something, know someone, see someone, and here are these two people now all of a sudden engaged!

  3. That’s because there is no “system” and it doesn’t “work.” I second Anon.

    -BM on the go

  4. I agree with Anon. I always look at everyone in amazement at vorts and think to myself about the wonder of it all.

    It also gets me to think about making shidduchim. If someone else could suggest these two unlikely, or even likely people, why not us?

  5. That’s true, AK – I just love those shidduchim where the boy and girl lived around the corner from each other their whole lives, or when there are 400 other people who know the chassan and kallah and wonder why they didn’t come up with the idea themselves.

  6. I still don’t understand shidduchim, even though I’ve been through it. K’Krias Yam Suf- only HaKadosh Baruch Hu can understand and create such nissim, within our ‘system’ (which may not be a system at all- thanks Anon.)

  7. You wanna know who has a system? The upper class white gentiles. Look in sunday NY Times. There is a debuante ball where the young women & men come out. It is mating season. The richest families marry into the richest families

  8. Pingback: Friday Repost: Some Shorts | Bad for Shidduchim

  9. In the frum world you also often have wealthy marrying wealthy, and rabbonish/yichus marrying likewise.
    The problem is also that we think there has to BE a system.
    And way too many people, especially shadchanim, go along with the “system” and don’t protest or complain loudly.
    And lastly, I think the major contributor to so many issues are Rebbeim who convince their talmidim (who offer nothing but the potential to learn indefinitely) to nix girls who don’t have enough money or yichus.

  10. Pingback: Repost: Clueless | Bad for Shidduchim

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