Shidduch Musical Contribution: Stick to the Status Quo

Erachet contributes ‘Stick to the Status Quo’ to The Shidduch Musical.

It’s really quite shocking the sort of deep inner desires that eligible young men and women harbor… Follow the link at your own risk!

 

Stick to the Shidduch Quo

Yossi:
Take a look
There’s nothin’ but books
When I am in the beis and on a roll
But I’ve got a confession
My own secret obsession
And it’s making me lose control

Other yeshiva boys:
Everybody gather ’round

Yossi(spoken):
Well if everyone’s telling their secrets then I can tell mine…I have facebook!

Yeshiva boys(spoken):
What?

Yossi(spoken):
I have facebook! Statii, pokes, even weird dorm life pictures

Yeshiva boys:
Not another sound

Yossi(spoken):
Someday I hope to have the most friends in YU!

Yeshiva boys:
No, no, no, nooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
Yeah, to be just like us
Stay away from that shtus
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo

Malkie:
Look at me
And what do you see
Such tznius, it’s beyond compare
But inside I am stirring
Something strange is occurring
It’s a secret I need to share

Girls:
Open up, dig way down deep

Malkie(spoken):
Bright colors are my passion! I love wearing green and pink and blue and red!
Girl(spoken):
Is that even legal?

Girls:
Not another peep

Malkie(spoken):
They’re just colors. Sometimes I think they’re cooler than wearing black.
Girls:
No, no, no, noooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
If you wanna be frum
Then don’t beat your own drum
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo

Out of towner:
Listen well
I’m ready to tell
About a need that I cannot deny
Dude, there’s no explanation
For this odd situation
But I’m ready to let it fly

OOTers:
Speak your mind and you’ll be heard

OOTer(spoken):
Alright, if they’re all telling their secrets… then I’m coming clean! I want to live in New York!

OOTer 1(spoken):
No way!

OOTer 2(spoken):
Where is it?

OOTer 3(spoken):
In China?

OOTer(spoken):
No, dude, it’s on the East Coast!

OOTers:
Not another word

OOTer 1(spoken):
Do you have to speak with an accent?

OOTer(spoken):
Shaw do!

OOTers:
No, no, no, nooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
If you wanna be down
Then please stay out of town
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quoooooooo

Everyone:
No, no, no
stick to the stuff you know
It is better by far
To keep things as they are
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo

Shadchan 1:
This is not what I want
This is not what I planned
And I just gotta say
I do not understand
Someting is really

Shadchan 2:
Something’s not right

Shadchan 1:
Really wrong

Shadchans:
And we gotta get things
Back where they belong
We can do it

OOTer:
Gawta stay!

OOTers:
Stick with what you know

Shadchans:
We can do it

Malkie:
Colors hooray!

Girls:
She has got to go

Shadchans:
We can do it

Yossi:
Poke away!

Yeshiva boys:
Keep your voice down low

Everyone:
Not another peep
No, not another word
No, not another sound
No

Shadchan 1:
Everybody quiet!

Girl 1(spoken):
Why is everybody staring at you?

Girl 2(spoken):
Not me, you.

Girl 1(spoken):
Because I have a blog? I can’t have people staring at me! I really can’t!

Everyone:
Noooooooooooooo, no, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
Yeah, to be just like us
Stay away from that shtus
Don’t mess with the flow, oh no
Stick to the status quooooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
If you wanna be frum
Then don’t beat your own drum
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status
stick to the status
Stick to the status quo

Alternate third section:

New Yorker:
Listen well
I’m ready to tell
About a need that I cannot deny
Dude, there’s no explanation
For this odd situation
But I’m ready to let it fly

NYers:
Speak your mind and you’ll be heard

NYer(spoken):
Alright, if they’re all telling their secrets… then I’m coming clean! I want to live in Dallas!

NYer 1(spoken):
Awesome!

NYer 2(spoken):
Where is it?

NYer 3(spoken):
In China?

NYer(spoken):
No, dude, it’s like down in Texas!

NYers:
Not another word!

NYer 1(spoken):
Do you have to speak with an accent?

NYer(spoken):
Y’all know it!

NYers:
No, no, no, nooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
If you wanna be down
Then don’t go out of town
Don’t mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo!

 


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