Shidduch Haiku

Call from the shadchan

With the perfect boy for me:

We go out one time.



In the restaurant

The waittress whispers to him,

“Last one was better.”



We enter the lounge

I glower across the room:

She is in my seat.



The tubs of ice cream

Are in the garbage, empty:

Last night was a date.



The Women in Black

Shake their heads and smile sadly:

My hair’s in a pony.





I have imbibed

Every flavor in Starbucks

And never paid once.



25 thoughts on “Shidduch Haiku

  1. It has just come to my attention that way too many of your posts got up before 6am. What time can you possibly be starting your day?

  2. My girls in Starbucks experience Haiku’d

    Most order water
    Which I suppose is better
    Cuz some get Naked

    (I mean the drink, MCP)

  3. at least u GET dates to go on. but then again u might as well have not since your no more ahead than us who dont get any…not to bum u out or anythin of course…

  4. Thinkaboutit,

    I totally agree. How come Bad4 always seems to have dates, and i go months in between dates…………

  5. @ anon and thinkaboutit:
    why do you both assume you has so many dates? she mentions specific dating experiences from the past in her posts.
    She doesn’t usually say,”last night, on my date” or s/t. like in this post, she is speaking of her general dates, or even the specific ones, but not necessarily does that mean they are frequent or infrequent. just my opinion.

  6. A haiku on how to keep your head on straight when dating and at all other times:

    Shema Yisrael
    Ado-shem Elokeinu
    Ado-shem Echad

  7. first of all she sez shes been through every flavor at starbux and knows the ppl at the marriot. u can get a vibe when someone has a dating life and u basically dont!

  8. Well… if Starbucks has about 87,000 possible flavor combinations, and even if Bad4 had three flavors per date, Bad4 would still need to have gone on 29,000 dates to imbibe every flavor! Now that is a lot of dates! 😛

  9. Yay Poll time- What would you (thinkaboutit this is aimed for you) prefer, numerous one and done or even longer running but ultimately never getting anywhere dates, on a weekly basis, or going on dates less often- in either situation, you will meet your bashert at the same time. eh?

  10. 29000 dates over about 5 years = 5800 dates/year
    divide that by 365.25 = about 16 dates/day

    How do you manage to find time to blog?

  11. Thank you Anonymous.
    I think sometimes people take everything I write just a teeny drop too literally and too personally.

  12. Love the haiku! Each is so very well crafted, with just the right feel to the overall structure and that great punch in the last line (not that I’m an expert or anything). If only more people would channel their dating frustation into literary production…

  13. in answer to ur poll- i think i wud like some one and dones as opposed to b.n. (basically none) grass is always greener eh

  14. Pingback: How Often? « Bad for Shidduchim

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