Off Topic: The Confessional

The credit for this post goes t LawSchoolDrunk, whose idea at yesterday’s post was too much fun to resist. Direct quote:

There should be a conversation piece posted by Bad4 on all sorts of house/dorm etiquette issues/pet peeves and have a female/male perspective conversation.

Once, an NMF was telling me that she doesn’t understand why couples fight. “If something your spouse does bothers you, you tell him/her. And then they fix it. What’s the big deal?”

“So you managed to resolve all those important issues like socks on the floor and toilet paper over versus under without any screaming fights or tears?” I asked in joking disbelief.

“Oh my gosh, please. He doesn’t like when I leave socks on the floor, so now I put them in the hamper. It really wasn’t hard.”

At this point I cracked up at her candid reversal of the stereotype, but I have to admit: I also kick off my socks at bedtime and forget about them. Though, to my defense, I pick them up when I see them on the floor the next morning. Usually.

So, which other women out there are ready to ‘fess up that they leave their socks lying around?

Wait! Don’t say anything yet. I don’t want any confessions yet. First let’s make a list of roommate peeves. That’ll be today’s task. Tomorrow we’ll reveal which gender is prone to which behaviors and who annoys who with what.

So I’m trusting you to have self-control. Do today’s task today and leave tomorrow’s fun for tomorrow.

Here’s my starter list:

Drinking from the carton

Leaving toothpaste uncapped/capping it sloppily

Squeezing toothpaste from top not bottom

Hair/stubble in the sink/shower

Toilet paper over versus under

Socks left on the floor

Clothes tossed over chairs

Toilet seat up/down

Hanging laundry to dry on the shower rod

Scattered shoes/slippers

Things stuffed into drawers

Closet doors left open

Things not returned to their places (be it bathroom scale or box of tissues)

Leaving lights on

Leaving dishes in the sink

Leaving things in the pockets of laundry

Slurping soup

Not replacing toilet paper that’s run out

Makeup left on sink

So, what have I left out? Time for your suggestions. Remember, just suggestions. Don’t weigh in with who does it and who it annoys yet.

While googling around for some ideas, I came across this WSJ article about how marriages break up over small stuff. Because, like my NMF pointed out, if there’s mutual respect, these things are easy enough to work out (in theory).

The article adds a few more items to the list:

My dad recently went on for eight minutes—I counted—about my mother’s proselytizing for sunscreen. Husbands told me about wives who “chomp” their gum or park the car crooked in the driveway, and wives griped about husbands who leave newspapers on the floor, refuse to put coasters under their drinks or walk around the house naked. One friend told of how her husband untucks all the sheets before getting into bed. A nonprofit executive said his wife has actually bickered with him while she was asleep.

Bathroom habits came up repeatedly. Working on this column, I’ve listened to tirades from men and women about toilet seats (up or down), toilet paper (over the roll or under it), hair left in the sink, bras hanging on the back of the door, dirty tiles and toothpaste tubes. “You cannot squeeze from the middle,” one woman insisted.

The dishwasher was a sticking point in Vige Barrie’s first marriage. She says her husband often left his dirty dishes in the sink or on the counter, a habit that so infuriated her she even brought it up with their marriage counselor. “It was beyond me that he couldn’t get his hand in gear to deliver a dirty dish a few inches over to the dishwasher,” says Ms. Barrie, 57, who works in media relations at Hamilton College in Clinton, N.Y. “Was I a maid?”

~ From Honey Do You Have To…? in the WSJ


18 thoughts on “Off Topic: The Confessional

  1. Leaving books in the toilet

    Leaving a computer in the toilet

    Eating in front of the computer

    Giving pet names to the spiders and yelling at anyone who dares to touch them

    Allowing the dog on the coach and the bed

    Letting a cat eat in one’s plate

    Not putting back the drinks in the fridge

  2. (Some more I thought of this morning)
    Not making one’s bed
    clicking/tapping pens
    dripping water all over the bathroom floor after a shower

  3. Leaving the shopping bags anywhere and everywhere instead of putting everything in place.

    Talking on the phone when I am trying to fall asleep.

    Not putting books back on shelves.

    Leaving clothes to hang on the back of the bathroom door.

  4. putting back empty containers. “oh, the pitcher’s empty?” then replacing it in the fridge WITHOUT FILLING IT UP! or “oh well, no more cereal> back in the cabinet it goes.” why? it’s even more annoying when each person repeats this process. just throw it out! 🙂
    also, leaving (cell phone) alarm on for when you want to get up, even if the other(s) have no interest getting up that early. Even vibrate- the noise is really loud!

  5. – staying for way too long and talking with absolutely every person at any and all social functions

    – never asking directions

    – drinking straight from the sink as if it’s a water fountain, with no cup

    – having too many shoes

  6. Leaving large, cold, wet foot prints on the bathmat – instead of drying their feet off a bit first.

    Leaving tweezed eyebrow hairs in the sink.

    Leaving the water running while brushing their teeth – such an unnecessary waste.

  7. I know this is mostly about annoying things people do in a house but what I find to be incredibly annoying is when people change lanes on the highway without signaling, do they want to get into an accident?

  8. I cant stand it when people wash their hands in the bathroom and open the door without drying them. The next person who touches the the door knob cringes when feeling the moisture, mind running wild about what the moisture is!

  9. Question – how often do people brush their teeth together with their roommate? I have no idea how my roommate pushes toothpaste out of the tube! Nor does it really affect me in any way. But perhaps that’s because we each have our own tube of toothpaste.

  10. Erachet: You can tell when the tube is half full but the top is crunkled and wrinkly because the roommate is trying to force toothpaste out the top when there’s none left there. If the toothpaste user is particularly thick, this leads to them throwing out a half-used toothpaste tube because they can’t get anything else out of it. Trust me, it happens. I’ve seen it. And it keeps me awake at night.

  11. Here are the ones I have not yet read above. There are some good ones already mentioned.

    1.Leaving bathroom door closed after a long hot shower to steam hanging clothing, thereby causing mold growth and uncomfortably moist bathroom

    2. Leaving toothpaste splatter on the counter/mirror

    3. Leaving toothpaste excess/mouthwash splatter in the sink

    4. Leaving hair, not just in the sink or tub/shower, but also on the counter, rug, or on the soap

    5. Not restocking anything (q-tips, cotton balls, bar soap, liquid soap, toothpaste etc) after finishing it (this goes way beyond merely failing to replace the toilet paper)

    6. Using up all the hot water

    7. Occupying the bathroom for more than 20 minutes; sometimes up to 1.5 hours

    8. Using blowdryer when other electronic appliance is in use, thereby blowing circuit breaker, and then not flipping circuit back on

    9. Not taking courtesy flushes or using air-fresheners

    10. Leaving toilet less than immaculate (‘nuff said)

    11. Breaking the scale out of anger (no, this doesn’t happen just in cathy comic strips)

    12. Leaving shower caps hanging in way that shower curtain won’t fully slide closed

    13. Clogging sink pipes with hair and then not taking care of problem

    14. Hanging clothing to dry and only removing a week after they become dry (the issue here is not focused on where are they hanging: shower head versus curtain pole)

    15. Eating in the bedroom

    16. Turning on light after someone else is sleeping

    17. Opening the window in winter while other roommate is cold

    18. Closing window in winter while other roommate is hot! (Trust me, no one is going to win this one)

    19. Washing utensils but not putting them away

    20. Loading the dishwasher incorrectly

    21. Not emptying the dishwasher after it ran

    22. Not restocking after finishing a necessary food item

    23. Hitting the snooze button 5 million times on alarm clock when it wakes up roommates each time

    24. Not taking shoes off when they are dirty

    25. Burping without excusing

    26. Talking unnecessarily loud in general, specifically on the phone

    27. Chewing with mouth open

    28. Excessive cursing

    29. Taking up two parking spaces

    30. Not pulling one’s weight wherever applicable

    31. Using items belonging to others without permission

    32. Using items of others’ with permission and then not treating items in the manner in which the owner would treat said items

    33. Not leaving the morning paper in the condition it was in when you started reading it (i.e. sections scattered around the apartment or out of order)

    34. cutting articles out of the paper before everyone read it

    35. inviting guests you know your roommates hate

    36. blasting music, especially when roommates dislike the genre

    37. not emptying the washer/dryer after use

    38. not taking out the trash when it’s obviously ready to overflow the garbage can

    39. leaving open containers in the fridge

    40. leaving the treadmill/exercise equipment sweaty after use

    41. cooking in the toaster oven without the bottom pan underneath (I can’t tell you how many times my roommates set off the fire detector causing the fire dept. to visit)

    42. leaving the toilet seat down but the cover up (it’s the females who do this!)

    43. losing roommates place in book they were reading

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