Link: Don’t Rush Into It

A good friend of mine got engaged after six dates. They went on six to keep their parents from freaking out. She actually knew she was getting engaged after three.

“What’s the rush?” I asked.

“When you know you know,” she said.

I suppose. Except there’s so much you don’t know.

Not that I’m a big fan of dating someone until you get cold feet either. Too much dating can do more harm then good. (Just get married already!)

And then there’s a third option: dating forever. Thank you Stupid Inventor for sending me this link to a story about a couple of newlyweds who are too arthritic to even hug properly. They dated for 30 years. Her advice? Get to know a person, be forgiving… and, apparently, keep him chasing you.

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7 thoughts on “Link: Don’t Rush Into It

  1. Agreed. Don’t rush… and don’t drag it out forever. I’ve told people “date until you’re sure. Then wait until you’re really sure. Then wait until you’re sure again… and then do it one more time. Then wait a drop, then get engaged.” So far at least I’ve yet to find someone who’s disagreed – there’s an inevitable series of ups and downs and doubts that are rather normal/natural for most people.

    I think I knew by the end of my second date I was getting married, but I’m still glad we dated three and a half months.

  2. The legendary Speaker of the House, Sam Rayburn, dated the same lady for 16 years or so, and they finally married … and separated 3 months later, eventually divorcing. He never spoke of the reasons for their breakup, but it was known to be a heartrending event.

  3. Relevant sentence: “Adelaide confesses to Nathan that she has been lying to her mother for the past 14 years [of their engagement] and has told her that she is married with a staggering five children.”

  4. “Too much dating can do more harm thAn good”
    I heard the “when you know you know” line a few times.
    Maybe you just never knew. lol

  5. Yes, there is something about knowing. Im not sure if I “knew”, but it felt right. I was scared out of my wits and unsure…. yet it still felt right. This is after ten dates.

    I do know a variety of people who have dated for too long, and things got too weird. After awhile you have to just dive in. There comes a point in dating where you reach a plateau, and only getting engaged (or breaking it off) is goign to change things one way or the other. So date until it feels right…. but don’t wait for fireworks.

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