Why – why – do you think that you know exactly why I’m not married yet?

Cuz guess what. After due consideration of your suggestion – and I did consider it long and hard – I have concluded that you’re not correct. So stop suggesting. You might have noticed that I’m not listening, which is why you keep repeating. Well please stop. Please, please, please stop.

Because I used to like you.


13 thoughts on “YOU

  1. Must be because you have a blog. Shame on you. Didn’t you know that girls are not supposed to have an opinion outside the BY Box?

  2. Everyone knows that it’s because:
    * Not davening hard enough
    * Not tznius enough
    * Friends not tznius enough or davening hard enough
    * Used a segulah the “wrong way”
    * etc…

    Some people are just plain tone-deaf when it comes to interpersonal relationships 😦

  3. I have discovered after many years of observation that anytime someone makes comments like that, it’s not about you. It’s about them. They want to feel omnipotent and superior, and what is easier than picking on a single?

  4. I was recently told (by a close relative, no less) that I had no business saying no to a potential shidduch due to “trivial” reasons because, “in case you didn’t realize (her words exactly)- you are twenty two and all your friends are married”. Really? Is that so? I didn’t notice- thank you much for pointing it out to me!

  5. This is the same person who informs me that if I wanted to get married, I would need to volunteer at a chesed organization. Forget the fact that I have a full time job and am in graduate school- I can always find time to do so. And where does that leave me time to study, socialize or DATE?
    But of course when the person in question got married before dating a full year and had two kids by the time she was my age, she obviously knows what she is talking about. (sarcasm)

  6. Bad4: Sorry you have to deal with this–I know how frustrating it is, from personal experience. Nothing you can do except move on (and have as little as possible to do with this “friend” from now on) because any conversation will only be an exercise in futility. Trust your gut instincts. The few times I took shidduch related advice from those type of people (against my better judgement) I always, always regretted it.

    NMF: Because some people, no matter how how hard you try to explain these type of things, refuse to accept what you have to say. In their eyes, they are experts with the *true* explanation. Some people will listen and try to “hear” what you are saying–they are few but do exist (like my mother’s good friend who finally said, “I truly don’t understand why singles object to hearing I’YHBY, but if you are telling me that they do, I accept it and will stop saying it to people”). This friend doesn’t sound like she belongs in the latter category.

    Princess Lea: Exactly.

  7. It obviously isn’t your time, then again we can’t know why Hashem does things the way “he” does. Also as far as I know you don’t have a job (a situation many of us are in) and it’s not easy to get married w/out a full time job (your love gave me such a thrill, but your love won’t pay my bills).

  8. Have you tried sticking a photo of “YOU” on the wall and throwing darts at it? I have heard that it can help one feel better almost instantly.

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