Thursday Links: The Skinny on Shidduchim

Everyone knows that being fat is bad for shidduchim. It’s amazing, really, how many people slim down when they turn 18. (Of course plenty don’t, and some of them even get married.) But this story is impressive in the extent that one woman went to get down to size… and only for dating purposes.

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10 thoughts on “Thursday Links: The Skinny on Shidduchim

  1. Impressive, yet disturbing.

    Her weight reached life-threatening heights, yet her inspiration to do something about it was to get a “good looking guy”? And her choice to opt for surgery is the not best; if she would have chosen the harder and longer way, then she wouldn’t always have that constant threat of her stomach exploding (I know someone who went bariatric; it’s not fun).

    Surgery in general is always a risk. It’s a shock to the body, and if the same result can be achieved without it doctors will recommend that. Then she had more surgery to remove excess skin? Shiver.

    Overeating to such a drastic extent is not a sign of a healthy mindset; I read how individuals who get stomach stapling end up becoming “holics” in other areas since they replace one addiction with something else. One woman, since she can’t eat anymore, became a shopaholic. One has to deal with the root of the problem first rather than simply cutting it away.

    Never mind all the fantasies of one-true love . . . to lose weight for a potential spouse, rather than oneself? SHE should be the priority, not the hypothetical him.

    (Clambers off soapbox).

  2. How quickly can you lose 200+ lbs? Besides, I bet being on “The Biggest Loser” is worse for shidduchim than lap band surgery…

  3. Princess lea, Sometimes when someone is that heavy, the surgery is the healthiest thing. Let’s face it, at that weight NONE of her choices were really very good. And plenty of people who do lose weight without surgery wind up with problems with excess skin that need to be dealt with.

    I do agree, though, that the idea that someone would only do something that drastic for shiduchim purposes is hugely disturbing.

  4. I know someone who lost 200 pounds via Overeaters Anonymous. She had flappy arms. She lost the weight due to a mid-life crisis.

  5. Um, people slim down at 18 because they’re off their crazy high school schedule of 4 hours of sleep a night and actually have time to eat something other than prepackaged food. Not necessarily for shidduch purposes.

  6. This is sick. 1, that a young woman would eat so much and endanger her life and her parents never got her help – they would have helped her if she had cancer!- 2, that instead of dealing with changing her unhealthy habits and disturbed psychological messages (I don’t mean she is crazy, but that her brain was getting hungry signals and not “I’m full” signals correctly), she reached the scary point of being morbidly obese and needed risky surgery 3, she thinks it is normal to a) diet and do surgery for a shidduch, not for her own life b) work with food after all this c) put her pictures int he paper and tell strangers her personal business.

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