Quote of the Week: Would You Go Out With Someone Who

Is it not the strangest question ever? “Would you go out with someone who wears a knitted kippa?” “Would you go out with a girl who wears denim skirts?” “Would you go out with a guy who doesn’t have a college degree?” “Would you go out with a girl studying to be a doctor?”

A gentleman was asked one of these types of questions. His reply? “That’s kind of like asking me if I’d eat baking powder. If there are other ingredients with it, then yes, I do.”

How’s that for clever? Here’s one of my favorite ways to eat baking powder. What’s yours?

Combine 5 teaspoons of it with the following ingredients:

2.5 c whole wheat flour

2 tablespoons honey

2 eggs

2 C milk

4 tablespoons oil

Mix wet and dry separately. Stir to moisten. Drip tablespoonfulls into a frying pan greased with hot oil. Fry.

From the Also4 Files

Also4 is probably the only forever-learning yeshiva guy who has a bone to pick with the bais yaakov system. The problem is that the teachers occasionally shoot off at the mouth (for lack of a better description, all due respect intended, etc), and there are wide-eyed, impressionable young ladies who actually take everything they say quite literally. (I’m not mocking: I was part of that group to an extent.) These students then take a line carelessly tossed off by someone older and wiser and solemnly incorporate into their understanding of the world in general and their husbands in particular. This means that Also4 has to field formally posed interview questions like:

“What if you had a sheila to ask but you were feeling lazy and didn’t want to ask it?”

Also4 replied, “The same thing as if I didn’t feel like getting up for shacharis or learning a full seder.”

Oy. I had to cover my face when I heard that. Also4, if you ever get convicted, keep your mouth shut and don’t waive your right to an attorney.

I agree with him, by the way. It’s amazing the sorts of things people try to feed us aidel maidels, as if we’re the most naive, gullible things on the planet. Which is why I burst out laughing when he related the following conversation:

Her: “Do you smoke?”

Him: (proudly) “No, of course not. I’ve never touched a cigarette in my life.”

Her: (disappointed) “Oh. So you’re not a serious learner then.”

I don’t know which enterprising young man started the rumor that all serious learners smoke, but he should be given some sort of prize for chutzpa and then hanged immediately. Yes, I’ve heard it. No, I’m not falling for it.

Thankfully, I date here in the good ol’ US of A, where we at least put up a facade of not interrogating each other.